We have all been there – a beautiful sunny weekend or a rainy Sunday night, we have all found ourselves craving to have somebody there to enjoy these times with. But for on reason or another, that someone was not always there. Those are the days when all your friends are seeing their other friends and your parents go out on their own and suddenly you find yourself feeling kind of ‘disabled‘ because things are only half fun when you are ALONE.
The eternal Celine Dion classic ‘All by Myself’ becomes a soundtrack to your day and you feel like everyone has betrayed you, your joy has been stolen and you start feeling for yourself while waiting for the phone to ring and someone to ask you out.
As someone who was the only single one when all my friends were in happy relationships and as having recently moved to a completely new area, I have had quite a few days like that… When I was single I thought that as soon as I get myself a boyfriend, those lonely days will cease and magically I will never ever have to spend an hour in my own company. But no, Matt has his own life and hobbies and I have learnt not to stop him doing those things just because I am scared to go out on my own. Mind you, as someone with anxiety, those days feel even worse.
So I spent quite a long time feeling sorry for myself and being angry at Matt for abandoning me on weekends. The feeling that I was wasting my time here doing nothing got so strong that I decided to fight it. So I started to learn TO LOVE MY OWN COMPANY. Slowly but Surely.
And let me tell you that, it is not an easy or quick journey. The first time I went out to have a coffee on my own, I felt like everyone was looking at me thinking how sad my life is to be out on my own, but of course in reality, no one cared. And that’s how it should be. We should not feel uncomfortable going out on our own or being judged for not having a companion because it is so much better doing things on your own than not doing anything because you are on your own.
A girl having a glass of prosecco on her own in the sun?– Probably her date stood her up? – NO, A MODERN TIME HERO who is up for a good time despite being by herself.
I now go out on my own a lot, I do not miss an opportunity to take myself out, treat myself to a coffee or a nice cocktail, wine and dine myself and always make sure that even if Matt is not available or there isn’t a friend around to join me, to attend any interesting daytime events (yes, daytime because due to my annoying anxiety, I can’t let myself be out on my own when it is dark).
I pass time by people-watching, reading books in the park or even blogging. AND I LOVE IT. My lonely days have now turned into dates with myself that bring me real inner peace and have helped me learn to love myself and appreciate my own company.
So Salute to all those boys and girls out there who don’t just stay at home feeling sorry for themselves but embrace the serenity of their ‘alone time’.